Holy.  Fudgin’.  Shite.

Yeah, it was the most expensive meal of my life.  But when you get all pragmatic about it, in terms of dollars per minute per molecule of enjoyment, it was a bloody bargain.

The French Laundry is a bargain.   Yes, yes it is.  It has been a bargain since it opened over a decade ago, it was all through those intervening  years with visits from foodies and aspiring gastronauts, and it still is.

Now, away from the pragmatism, I’ll give you a very brief degustation with as little gushing as possible.

Rose, salmon, gougeres, caviar, panna cotta, fois gras, endive, black bass, sea urchin, scallops, Shiraz, veal tongue, pork belly, lamb roast, camembert, carrot cake, passionfruit sorbet, peanut butter chocolate mousse, citrus sorbet w/ olive oil, almond tart, mignardeses.

Yowch.  I do not feel the pain of overindulgence, nor do I feel any pain of sticker shock.  All is appropriate, all is perfection. No less than two dozen people had a hand in making my meal divine, including about a dozen in the kitchen.  They all earned it, especially my server who recommended the perfect wines and even chatted with me graciously about running and his own marathon training plans.  Unlike at a standard chain restaurant, I never got his name, so I can only say, Good luck!!!

The other thing I can say to those who balk at a several-hundred-dollar meal is this:

How much did you spend the last time you got on a plane to visit relatives for the holidays, or see a friend, or (forbid) take a business trip?  Was *that* four hours of your life enjoyable?  And how many times per year or decade do you spend that kind of money on transportation?  I rest my case.

Eat well.  Be well.  Take care.

Yet, if you wanted to make your own, you could add the ideal cheese for melting – American.  Or, you can go a little more upscale and flavorful, even if the results won’t be quite as silky in the end.

I think you cannot go wrong with a cheesemaker that’s a mere few miles from where I grew up in America’s Dairyland:  Widmer’s Cheese Cellars in Theresa, WI.

Getting a big ol’ pile of shrink-wrapped bars is a holiday tradition, but you can have the delicious love, too – their prices online are identical to in the store.  You’ll only pay shipping, and they’re even pretty cheap in that regard, too!

For the top of the line, 10 year aged Cheddar is as rich and decadent as Parmesan, for slivers on a salad or whatever use you can dream up.  On burgers, I’d probably go a little more mellow, like Provolone, salty and tender.

Here’s to green chile meets meat meets cheese!

Then…. the much more famous Meers Burger in Meers, OK – featured in Hamburger America and made from grass-fed Texas longhorn cattle raised on site.  Take that, kitchen farmers!

Both were well worth the brief detours they required from OKC, though Meers was a good hour.  Similar to going to the Owl in San Antonio from Albuquerque.

Now its back on home for a needed chile fix.

They won’t grow anywhere near here, and there is a tiny possibility south Florida could harvest the fruit, but no one transports them around, so basically it is a Hawaiian treat.  When can I go back?

http://www.hort.purdue.edu/newcrop/morton/canistel.html

Another lovely photo, on Flickr.

Keep in mind that the alien landscape above was a luscious and mouth watering treat mere days prior to this photo.  Yet, homemade foodstuffs lack one of the critical ingredients we’ve learned to rely on in our modern culinary landscape:  preservatives.

Even with its foolproof recipe and top-notch ingredients, time was still the enemy of the final slice of sweet dessert.  Behold the forgotten last piece of pumpkin pie, tragically relegated to the trash bin with its splotchy white growths:

If nothing else, this might get you interested in poking around great neighborhood joints on your next Windy City trip instead of eating only around your hotel/convention/family.  Great food cities deserve food pilgrimages.

We only needed a 2.3 mile journey to one of the best thin crust places east of the Mississippi – Coalfire Pizza, sporting a 850 degree coal and wood-fired oven and blackened crusts with the chew of a baguette.

First, the oven (one of our pizzas on the right):

And the final product, already beginning to be devoured:

The char is intentional and carcinodelicious!

Peek under the hood:

I talked with the owner quite a bit as our food was being prepped (sorry, my table of wonderful friends!), and he waxed poetic about his crust, his oven, the technique.  He waxed not so poetic about the vagaries about bloggers and the internet meme thing that nearly crushed his staff the first week they were open.

Having survived the LTH onslaught, Coalfire went on to garner a Great Neighborhood Restaurant award, the coveted argyle placard.

Ok, so how was the damn pizza?  It was stunning.  High heat means the exterior crisps up and chars, but seals in some steam so the interior is soft and chewy.  Toppings are sparse and perfectly balanced.  Seriously, this is close to Pizzeria Bianco . . . but not quite.  I don’t care.  Its pretty amazing.

How can you say no to a crispy fresh vibrant tangle of meat and bun and salad like this?

Per the U.K. blog “Very Good Taste” I am going to try my hand at the Omnivore’s 100 – a list of foods that every omnivore should explore to broaden their palate.

To participate, just go to the original post and copy & paste the list before identifying the stuff you’ve eaten or won’t eat.

Instructions:

1) Copy this list into your blog or journal, including these instructions.
2) Bold all the items you’ve eaten.
3) Cross out any items that you would never consider eating.
4) Optional extra: Post a comment here at www.verygoodtaste.co.uk linking to your results.

The VGT Omnivore’s Hundred, as experienced by Andrea Lin:

1. Venison
2. Nettle tea
3. Huevos rancheros
4. Steak tartare
5. Crocodile
6. Black pudding
7. Cheese fondue
8. Carp
9. Borscht
10. Baba ghanoush
11. Calamari
12. Pho
13. PB&J sandwich
14. Aloo gobi
15. Hot dog from a street cart
16. Epoisses
17. Black truffle
18. Fruit wine made from something other than grapes
19. Steamed pork buns
20. Pistachio ice cream
21. Heirloom tomatoes
22. Fresh wild berries
23. Foie gras
24. Rice and beans
25. Brawn, or head cheese
26. Raw Scotch Bonnet pepper
27. Dulce de leche
28. Oysters
29. Baklava
30. Bagna cauda
31. Wasabi peas
32. Clam chowder in a sourdough bowl
33. Salted lassi
34. Sauerkraut
35. Root beer float
36. Cognac with a fat cigar
37. Clotted cream tea
38. Vodka jelly/Jell-O
39. Gumbo
40. Oxtail
41. Curried goat
42. Whole insects
43. Phaal
44. Goat’s milk
45. Malt whisky from a bottle worth £60/$120 or more
46. Fugu
47. Chicken tikka masala
48. Eel
49. Krispy Kreme original glazed doughnut
50. Sea urchin
51. Prickly pear
52. Umeboshi
53. Abalone
54. Paneer
55. McDonald’s Big Mac Meal
56. Spaetzle
57. Dirty gin martini
58. Beer above 8% ABV
59. Poutine
60. Carob chips
61. S’mores
62. Sweetbreads
63. Kaolin
64. Currywurst
65. Durian
66. Frogs’ legs
67. Beignets, churros, elephant ears or funnel cake
68. Haggis
69. Fried plantain
70. Chitterlings, or andouillette
71. Gazpacho
72. Caviar and blini
73. Louche absinthe
74. Gjetost, or brunost
75. Roadkill
76. Baijiu
77. Hostess Fruit Pie
78. Snail
79. Lapsang souchong
80. Bellini
81. Tom yum
82. Eggs Benedict
83. Pocky
84. Tasting menu at a three-Michelin-star restaurant.
85. Kobe beef
86. Hare
87. Goulash
88. Flowers
89. Horse
90. Criollo chocolate
91. Spam
92. Soft shell crab
93. Rose harissa
94. Catfish
95. Mole poblano
96. Bagel and lox
97. Lobster Thermidor
98. Polenta
99. Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee
100. Snake

Ecco Espresso and Gelato

Now, I’m not saying that I’ve found the holy grail of espresso here in town, or that there even is one.  I give you as example that our bar of expectation is not yet high enough, a photo of a working “joe” having his morning beverage with rounded fingers barely able to grip the tiny cup and a portly wallet ready to throw a fiver on the counter:

…and then, let’s zoom out to take in the whole scene so that you can feel the seriousness that is espresso at 7:50am on a weekday in Manhattan:

Now, this is a place where it is all about the delivery of a premium product with lightning-fast service, perfection of skills, and style to boot.

Each and every one of the employees looked like they had been doing this for years, each wore a button down light blue shirt with a tie tucked in halfway so as to convey both formality and function as they darted up and down the 40′ space delivering hot brown beverages to customers who sipped and gulped them down standing up before heading to their train.

No to-go orders here, no chairs, no wifi, no music.  Just pure efficiency and a rigorous adherance to what they know to be holy and good:  ground fermented roasted berries assaulted with pressurized steam served in heated porcelain cups.

Capisce?